Guilt

I don’t know if this is universal, although I can’t imagine it’s just me. I’ve been feeling pretty guilty about putting J through all this. The early mornings, the running to pick up meds last minute… everything. And most of all for making it so difficult to have a baby. As of right now it is likely just me and my lack of ovulating that’s stopping us, and I just feel as though I’m holding something back from him. He of course has explicitly told me he doesn’t feel this way, but the guilt is definitely still there. As I write this I have a lump in my throat. Not sure what the sudden sadness is about.

In other news they upped me to 2 menopur vials. I have to go back in tomorrow to be monitored again. It isn’t really a good day for it as I have to be at work early and I’m going straight to J’s graduation in the evening. But, you don’t get much of a choice in this game.

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3 thoughts on “Guilt

  1. I think it’s natural to feel that way but you also have to ask yourself: Would he be doing it if he didn’t want to? I don’t think so! I mean it’s pretty invasive and it’s not that much fun for a guy. He’s doing it because he wants it too, and he loves you and supports you. You are lovable so don’t feel guilty for accepting his love!

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  2. It’s not your fault. It’s not like you planned things out to be a bit more difficult, and I bet your hubby doesn’t feel that way either. My hubby said when I felt guilty that he was more upset by the fact that I was going through a hard time and he couldn’t “fix” it for me.

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